Being A Good Father

Since we are adoptive parents, we have spent a lot time being evaluated, qualified and confirmed as being acceptable parents. As a result, I do think a lot about being a good parent, and a good father. While there is no guide book, there is an abundance of articles and books in the field. Recently, I read 10 Ways To Be A Great Dad at MSN.com and Ten Ways to be a Better Dad from Oprah.com.

Here's my list:

1. Be respectful and considerate of family. Treat them as they would like to be treated, as I would have like to been treated as a child, or as I want to be treated as an elderly parent. Attitudes towards others are often learned from parents.



2. Be available. One reason I retired in my forties was to make sure I didn't miss time with my daughter. With 60 hour minimum work weeks and travel, I knew that I would be missing a lot, and I wouldn't get that time back later. I now have time to do just about anything my daughter would like.



3. Be a role model. Kids learn through imitation. As I have learned, they will imitate good and bad behaviors, indiscriminately.



4. Be a teacher. I must admit this is an opportunity area for me. I have always been quick to learn but not as good in teaching others. My wife, who comes from a family of teachers, has been excellent in this area. I'm still learning on how to make teaching fun. Teaching may also include occasional discipline, when needed.



5. Be a listener. I will never forget a short conversation I had with our CEO when I was a relatively new employee. He gave his entire attention and discussed my topic, as if it were the most important thing at the moment. I try to give my daughter similar attention when she has something to say.

Only time will tell if I figured it out and whether I will be remembered as a great dad. In the meantime, I get great satisfaction from having lots of time with my daughter every day.

For more on Crossing Generations, check back every Thursday for a new segment.

This is not financial advice. Please consult a professional advisor.

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