I am happy that we had children later in life. I believe that I will be better parent than I would have been in my 20s. However, there are also many pros to having kids when one is young. Based on my own experience, here are some advantages of being a younger or older parent.
Younger
Better physical condition. Young kids require carrying, chasing, and lifting. These are just a few of the exercises of a parent. It's easier to keep up when one is younger.
Multitasking. Keeping track of a young child can be mentally challenging. When I was younger, it seemed I could do many more things at the same time.
Social network. Parents of your child's friends and classmates are about the same age. So it's easier to find parents with common interests and experiences.
Older
More financially secure. In my twenties, I had a student loan, a car loan and had purchased my first house. Although I was saving money, it always seemed that any extra expense was challenging. As an older parent, it seems less of a financial hardship to have a child.
More easy going. I worry less about things getting broken, items on the floor, book pages getting torn or things getting lost. Stuff happens :-) I also realize my daughter is her own person, with her own interests, and that she could (will likely:-) be very different than me.
Greater interest in our child. In my twenties, I was very focused on me - my job, my activities, and my friends. As an older parent, I have tremendous interest in and fun with what my daughter likes to do.
Younger
Better physical condition. Young kids require carrying, chasing, and lifting. These are just a few of the exercises of a parent. It's easier to keep up when one is younger.
Multitasking. Keeping track of a young child can be mentally challenging. When I was younger, it seemed I could do many more things at the same time.
Social network. Parents of your child's friends and classmates are about the same age. So it's easier to find parents with common interests and experiences.
Older
More financially secure. In my twenties, I had a student loan, a car loan and had purchased my first house. Although I was saving money, it always seemed that any extra expense was challenging. As an older parent, it seems less of a financial hardship to have a child.
More easy going. I worry less about things getting broken, items on the floor, book pages getting torn or things getting lost. Stuff happens :-) I also realize my daughter is her own person, with her own interests, and that she could (will likely:-) be very different than me.
Greater interest in our child. In my twenties, I was very focused on me - my job, my activities, and my friends. As an older parent, I have tremendous interest in and fun with what my daughter likes to do.
While this doesn't cover all the differences, it highlights what I consider the major advantage differences. It's too bad that we couldn't have the best of both ages at the same time:-)
For more on Crossing Generations , check back every Thursday for a new segment.
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This is not financial or parenting advice. Please consult a professional advisor.
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5 comments:
Good post.
I have to agree mostly with
Greater interest in our child. In my twenties, I was very focused on me - my job, my activities, and my friends. As an older parent, I have tremendous interest in and fun with what my daughter likes to do.
If I would have had a child in my twenties it would have been a struggle I had my most debt in my 20s
Now I am more secure with money and I am focused on my daughter ( I am less selfish)
For as the physical conditions -- take vitiams
Moneymonk,
Thanks for the comment.
In addition to vitamins, I am going to start a little weight training :-)
I'm 56 with a 17 yr old and a 9 yr old. I wish that I had started in my early instead of late thirties with the kids. All in all though, I think I was much more patient and secure in myself when they arrived than I would have been in my twenties.
Shine On,
Lill
I think you missed the most important Pro for having children when you are younger.
Being a young parent also means being a young grandparent. My parents are in their late 70s and have no strength to keep up with their grandchildren whereas my wifes parents are in their late 50s and are totally involved. Also, being a grandparent is so rewarding and enjoyable. The younger you are the more years you'll have as a grandparent.
Heres another point.
One thing many parents dont realize when their kids are young is that kids will be adults for most of their lives. This may be an obvious fact but we dont see it when we are chasing toddlers all day. That being said, when our sons and daughters are in their 20s wouldnt we rather be in our 40s and not in our 50s or 60s.
Its also nice to have more than one child. Having children when you are young enables you to have 3, 4, 5, or more kids. Assuming you'll stay sane enough.
I like this post. Its a good discussion.
Lill,
I hope I still enjoy being an older parent when our daughter is 10ish. We'll see :-)
Husbandhood,
Excellent points. I hadn't thought about older parents trading away being young grandparents. I don't have a preference on being a 40 or 60 year old parent of a 20 year old. At either age, I will likely be uncool to a 20 year old:-)
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